You Asked For it

Posted on May 26, 2014 @ 9:29pm by Captain Michael Turlogh Kane
Edited on on May 28, 2014 @ 1:01am

Mission: All Our Yesterdays
Location: USS DISCOVERY
Tags: Kass, Russ, Drunkenness

"YOU ASKED FOR IT"

(Continued from "Friends In Low Places")
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"What shall we do with a drunken sailor?"
- Traditional Sea Shanty

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Location: USS DISCOVERY, en route to the Beta Quadrant
Stardate: [2.14]0519.0230
Scene: Bridge


Lieutenant Lex Calvari shifted position at the SecTac chair. Up here in the raised dais at the rear of the DISCOVERY's bridge, he had a bit of a vantage point to see everything that was going on. True, he had to turn around to see the bridge engineering and science stations, but he was looking down on the centre seats and had probably the best place to see the main viewer on the whole bridge.

He was a long way from home. Xenex was on the other side of the Federation in sector 221, and growing up there he had a different name. In the guttural tongue of his native world he was known as L'x Kh'alvry. In a startling example of Hodgkin's Law of Planetary Parallel Evolution, the Xenexian people were almost exactly Human, save for bright purple irises and the ability to regulate their own body temperatures. Ten years ago, the DISCOVERY had found an ancient stasis-field containing the frozen body of a Preserver named Isador, thus finally elevating Hodgkin's Law from mere theory to absolute proof. Her people had seeded the primordial oceans of thousands of worlds in the infant galaxy with their own genetic codes - over millions of years, evolution had worked its harsh magic on the resulting life-forms that grew to sentience on those worlds. Like Humans, Xenexians evolved from a primitive arboreal life-form that came down from the trees and learned to walk hundreds of thousands of years ago. First Contact with the Federation had been with Humans - the resulting culture shock had been profound when Xenexians realised that almost all the sentient races of the galaxy were humanoid. Everyone looked like each other - that thought had gone a long way towards curbing their warlike natures.

So Lex could not get used to the presence of the andoid. Lieutenant Byte was sitting in the centre seat - both Captain Kane and Commander Stonn were off-duty, and night watch was underway. As an officer who did not need to eat or sleep, Byte could be available for duty twenty-four hours a ship's day. True enough, it looked humanoid, but it was a soulless thing. When they met, they had shook hands - Byte's hands were as cold and dead as stone. It only blinked because it was programmed to. It gave Lex a shivery feeling down his spine.

{{Journey's End to bridge.}}

Everyone looked up in surprise. Byte stood up from the centre seat quickly. Journey's End on Deck 14 was the ship's lounge. Facing towards the bow, it had several large windows offering stunning views of the starfield ahead. As well as acting as a bar and mess hall, it was the centre of the ship's social life, run by the enormous demon known as John Doe and his motley crew. John Doe wasn't really a demon, but he was seven-feet tall, horned, cloven-hoofed, and covered in firey red skin. It was his stentorian voice that had called up to the bridge.

Byte turned to Lex. As the two senior officers on the bridge, whatever was going on was up to them to deal with, either by resolving it now or by kicking it up the chain of command.

{{This is Lieutenant Byte on the bridge,}} said Byte. {{What seems to be the problem, Mister Doe?}}

John Doe paused for a moment, as if he was unsure he should be doing this. {{I hate to do this, Lieutenant, but there are two senior officers down here in Journey's End. I'm afraid they're both very drunk and becoming a nuisance.}}

Lex got to his feet. Byte was already looking at him. With a nod, the android indicated that he should take over the conversation.

"This is Lieutenant Calvari, the Security Chief," he said. "Tell me what's going on."

John Doe was still hesitant. {{Well, I don't want to be a tattle-tale...}}

"That is not the issue," said Lex. "Please, go on."

John Doe sighed. {{Well, it's the marine commander. And I think it's one of the Operations crew, a lieutenant. She's smoking. They're both drinking. She was rude to one of my staff when he asked her to stop. They're both generally being loud and obnoxious. I'd ask them to leave, but I don't have any rank to pull on them.}}

"Are they causing trouble?"

{{Everyone's looking at them. They don't seem to notice. Wait - }}

Lex waited.

{{They just got up,}} said John Doe. {{They're leaving. He's helping her out. She seems unsteady.}} He paused a moment. {{Look, Mister Calvari, they've just left. The problem is over. Please disregard my call.}}

"Are you sure?" said Lex. "A Starfleet officer is not permitted to be drunk aboard ship."

{{Yes, it's fine. Everyone's going to be talking about them for a couple of days but no harm done. Thanks anyway.}}

"As you wish," said Lex. "Bridge out." Her turned back to Byte and shrugged. "Situation seems to have resolved itself. No need to inform Commander Stonn."

Byte nodded. {{Resume your station.}}

Lex slid back into the SecTac seat. Why on Earth (or anywhere else in the galaxy) did nothing interesting ever happen at night? In all the vast cosmos, everything seemed to occur when the senior staff were up and about and able to respond to it. Nothing ever happened when everyone was asleep.

He checked the chronometer. Twenty minutes until he finished his shift. He decided that he would simply return to his quarters, eat a light meal - a salad, perhaps - and go to sleep. At some point during the night, they would leave Federation space behind. When he woke up in the morning, he would be amongst alien stars.

{{Crewman Turner to Security.}}

Lex sat upright again. Now what? He recognised the voice - Vincent Turner was one of his own security guards. "Security. Go ahead, Crewman."

The voice was hesitant, just like John Doe's. {{Um, I'm on deck five, sir. I've just passed two officers in the corridor. They're both drunk and mumbling to each other. One can barely walk and the other is holding her up. They're staggering all over the deck. He bumped into me but carried on like nothing had happened. They look a real mess, sir.}}

That did it. Lex stood up again. "Thank you, Crewman. Carry on." He turned to Byte. "Permission to leave the bridge?"

{{Granted, Lieutenant.}}

Lex was moving for the turbolift, speaking to the air. "Calvari to Ensign Hale."

{{Hale here. Go ahead, sir.}}

"Security team to deck five, Ensign. Possible drunk and disorderly."

{{Acknowledged.}}

The turbolift doors swooshed shut. At last, he thought. First job on duty.

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Scene: Deck 5 - Kass's Quarters
Time Index: Just after Chris's post


Lex met Justin Hale and Jack Hockema outside the marine commander's quarters. She had only moved in there less than twenty-four hours ago.

"You work fast," he muttered.

"What's the situation, sir?" Jack Hockema asked. He was a huge black man from a city called New York on Earth. His hands looked like the blades of shovels. The other officer, Justin Hale, was the child of colonists from some backwater planet from the Federation's coreward border.

Lex read the name-plate on the door. Kassandra Thytos. "Major Thytos and Lieutenant BaShen have been reported drunk in Journey's End. Conduct unbecoming. Be ready to back me up in case there's an incident."

He pushed the door chime. There was no answer. He tried again. It might have been his imagination, but he thought he heard a snort and some slurred words.

"Maybe we should leave them alone?" said Jack Hockema.

"They're a disgrace," said Justin Hale, shaking his head. "Getting drunk on alcohol is so primitive." He said the last word with some distaste. "We should wake Captain Kane and report them both."

"No need for that," said Lex. "Computer, this is Security Chief Calvari. Security override on this door."

The door hissed open, revealing a godawful mess within. Both Thytos and BaShen were barely conscious - her on a couch, and him splayed out on the floor. The smell of alcohol was strong in the air.

Hockema and Hale watched from corridor as Lex stepped into the room. "Careful, sir," said Hale. "There's so much ethanol in the air this place will explode if you make a spark."

Russ BaShen was flat-out unconscious. He had obviously collapsed in a drunken stupor. He was lying on one arm, and a puddle of drool was gathering at the side of his mouth. Kassandra Thytos was slumped on the couch, half-slouched over, eyes half-open but unseeing.

Lex nudged Russ's face with his boot. "Hey," he said gently. "Wake up."

Russ stirred, but didn't rouse.

Lex leaned down on his haunches, wondering if he should call for medical assistance. He shook Russ by the shoulder. "Hey!" he called. "I said wake up!"

That did it. They both moved, opening bleary eyes that looked around in confusion. Kass sat up and Russ picked himself up, swaying unsteadily on his feet.

"Whaz happening?" he slurred.

Lex felt a surge of anger. "I've had two separate reports of you two being drunk tonight. One in Journey's End, one staggering through the ship's corridors. I don't know what you think you're doing, but this is not the way Starfleet officers behave. Look at yourselves. You're both a mess. Don't you have any pride?"

Kass struggled to her feet. She had to grasp the couch's arm-rest. "Who are you?" she blurted.

"I'm Lex Calvari, the Security Chief. And you two are on the verge of spending the rest of the night in the brig."

"Hey! Hey buddy!" Russ was smiling daftly. He put a hand on Lex's shoulder. "We're just drunk! We're happy drunk! Yay! You want a drink?"

"No, I do not."

Russ leaned in towards his ear. "I think she fancies me," he slurred, his breath heavy with alcohol. "I think she wants me."

"I don't care about that."

Russ opened his hands in a what-the-fuck gesture. "Hey! What's your problem anyway?" He lost his balance and collapsed onto the couch.

"Look," said Lex, rolling his eyes. "This doesn't have to go any farther than me. If Captain Kane found out you were drunk aboard ship your careers would be in a nosedive. If you both go to sleep now and don't cause anyone any more problems, I won't report this to the ExO."

Kass had been listening to all this. The lights of her sensor net were flickering madly. "Oh," she said, "you're going to report us to the captain, is that it?"

"I might."

Kassandra came right up to Lex, getting under his nose. She put his finger in his face. "What if I told you that I didn't care? What if I told you that you could go and be the captain's bitch for all I care? Huh, bitch?" She pushed Lex, but was too drunk to have any impact. She slumped backward onto the couch beside Russ. They sat there together.

"Look, don't be stupid." Lex was already regretting ever getting involved in this.

"Go tell Kane!" yelled Kass, waving her arms around drunkenly. "Go tell him, captain's bitch! You'll find him somewhere up his own ass!"

They both sniggered drunkenly on the couch. They looked into each other's eyes.

Lex's jaw set. "Have it your way," he said, storming back out into the corridor. "Computer - close and lock this door. Open under security override only."

Obediently, the door hissed shut, locking solidly.

Lex turned to Hockema. "Remain here until relieved. If either of them get outs, restrain them and put them in brig."

"Yes, sir."

He turned to Hale. "You're dismissed, Ensign."

"Yes, sir. What are you going to do?"

Lex's anger was visible. "Just what she said to do, Ensign."

He stalked away to the nearest turbolift.

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Scene: Deck 2, Senior Officer's Quarters


Lex paused for moment outside Stonn's quarters, wondering if he was doing the right thing. Then the feelings of anger came back again. Ears still stinging from their laughter, he pushed the door chime.

It took a few seconds for the Vulcan's voice to respond. {{Come.}}

The door opened. Stonn was standing in the centre of his quarters. He was wearing pyjama bottoms and a vest. He had obviously straightened his hair, but a big cowlick was sticking up on one side. He was somewhat bleary-eyed. "Lieutenant Calvari. It is after midnight. I trust there is a problem aboard ship?"

Lex stapped inside. "Yes, Commander. I'm afraid there is."

The door closed behind him. Things were escalating.

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NRPG:

CHRIS / ALIX: What a mess! Anyway, it is appropriate for Lex to report to the First Officer, not the captain. The ExO is responsible for the day-to-day running of the ship, while the CO remains free to deal with bigger crises should they arise. In this case, Commander Stonn will be attempting to solve this little inter-personal problem, giving you both a chance to write with him. Even though he is a Vulcan, Stonn didn't get where he is by being a stick-in-the-mud. Something tells me he will slap you on the wrist in a Vulcan way and let you off with it, if you're contrite. There is no need to escalate this to the Captain. Unless you want to. But it won't be pretty ;)


Jerome McKee
The Soul of Captain Michael Turlogh Kane
Commanding Officer
USS DISCOVERY


"He speaks an infinite deal of nothing!"
- Shakespeare's 'The Merchant of Venice', Act 1, Scene 1.113

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